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Online Bingo Jokes

We love to hoot and holler here at Giggle Bingo, and couldn’t get through the day without a gut busting chuckle! We’ve put together a few of our favourite Bingo jokes for you to enjoy!

10 ways you can tell that you’re a Giggilicious Bingo Nut! We’ve all done them!

  1. You have your friends around for a cup of coffee and when laughing at one of their jokes you say “L.O.L”.
  2. You get your partner to join your online bingo home so you can spend time together.
  3. Your kids learn to count from 1- 90 at an early age, but their teachers are bewildered why when your child yells out “88” they follow it by “two fat ladies”!
  4. You change your Bingo nickname so much that you have to look at your own Bingo profile to see who you really are.
  5. You go into labour and your first thought is to pop into Chat to let all the roomies know that you're going to the hospital, and that they will soon have a time for the Bingo Baby Sweepstake that’s been running!
  6. When someone new starts at work you ask what their age/sex/location is!
  7. You say BRB at dinner to pop in and check on your Bingo Tickets.
  8. When the internet is down you visibly go into withdrawal.
  9. When your teenagers use potty language you threaten to mute them!
  10. You get up to go to the loo at night, and end up seated at the computer saying ‘Hi’ to your roomies and playing a few games of Bingo!

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Q: How do you get a sweet, little old lady to say the F-word?
A: Get another little old lady to shout "BINGO!!!

Betty, Ethel, Gertrude and Stan are sitting at a table at the local Bingo Hall when for the first time in 7 years, Stan the man gets a full house!! In the excitement of jumping up and down shouting Bingo, his trousers accidentally fall down, exposing him fully to the startled ladies! Betty and Ethel had a stroke, and Gertrude couldn’t reach… Bless her!

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As I lay me down to slumber
All I need is one more number
When to the big game I go
I pray the Lord I yell BINGO.

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Q: What do rodents say when they play bingo?
A: 'Eyes down for a full mouse'!

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One night, an 87-year-old woman came home from Bingo to find her husband in bed with another woman. Angry, she became violent and ended up pushing him off the balcony of their 8th-floor apartment, killing him instantly. When brought before the court on charges of murder, she was asked if she had anything to say to defend her actions.

"Well, ya Honour," she replied coolly. "I figured that at 92, if e’ could get his old fella up for another woman, e’ could blooming well fly n’all!"

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Q. How many bingo callers does it take to change a light bulb?
A. One, on his own, just the one!

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Last night, my pals and I went to our local Bingo as they put on some male dancers for us!
One of the women wanted to impress the rest of us, so she pulled out a tenner. When the male dancer came over to us, my friend licked the tenner and stuck it to his butt cheek! OMG!
Not to be outdone, another pal pulled out 20 quid. She called the dancer back, licks the 20 quid and sticks it to his other butt-cheek.
In another attempt to impress the rest of us, my third pal pulls out 50 quid, calls the guy over and licks the 50 quid note! OMG OMG! I'm quite worried at this stage just where she’s gonna be sticking that but fortunately, she stuck it to one of his butt cheeks again. Phew!
My relief was short-lived. Seeing the way things are going, the guy gyrates over to me!!! Heavenly Days! Now everyone's attention is focused on me, and the guy is egging me on to try to top the 50 quid. My brain was churning as I reached for my purse...... just what could I do????
My all woman instincts took over! I got out my debit card, swiped it down the crack of his butt and grabbed the eighty quid!!

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A lady from Sydney loved Bingo,
So much so that she taught her Dingo,
She took him along to the hall,
Where they both had a ball,
Till he Full-Housed but could not speak the Lingo!

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It was a Ladies Only Night in the All Blonde 75-Ball Bingo Hall. The night had been pretty boring, not one single person had a BINGO all night. The last game was up for grabs, with a huge bingo prize of $3500.00 in the pot for blackout.
The game drags on and on, and nearly every blonde in the house had to be on for the big blackout. Finally, G-47 was called, but still no shouts of “Bingo!” were heard. The frustrated caller finally gets up and throws the Bingo Machine off the stage. All the girls were shocked and the caller says: "I've just called every darn one of these 75 balls out of this machine and nobody has a Bingo? Just what number are you ladies waiting for?" All together, 412 blonde ladies shouted: "FREE SPACE!"!

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